Five Years With My Rainbow


“What did you make me when you were born?” I always ask my 4-year-old.

“Happy,” he replies while cackling deep from his gut – the way he always laughs.

And it’s so true.

Next week will mark five years of my little boy making me happy. To celebrate the colorful light he has brought back to my life, I dedicate this week’s blog post to him.

I’m not going to sugar coat things. His pregnancy was one of the hardest times in my life. It took me a while to get pregnant and when I did I worried nonstop that he would die in the womb like his brother before him.

I learned to sit back, take deep breaths and relish the feeling of his kick against my stomach.

467871_10151336849707889_1519287247_oThe day he was born my heart felt happy.

He is my rainbow.

What is it like having a rainbow baby?

It’s like living through one of the darkest storms of your life, wondering if the wind and rain will ultimately consume you, then spotting a streak of color and light in the distance.

You are drawn to it. You cling to it. You thank the heavens for it.

And you never want to let it go.

13524554_10208440581071022_7536633307077381544_nI’ve had five glorious years with my rainbow. And I never want to let him go.

Having him has not only brought me pure joy, but it has taught me to appreciate the good things in life. The times when things work out.

My little rainbow is the happiest kid I have ever met. He loves everything in life and laughs at least a hundred times a day.

10362804_10152738143392889_2736045714292664483_oHe is really smart and will help with anything I ask. He loves to cut down weeds and help stir the food for dinner.

He’s obsessed with dinosaurs, dragons and lava wolfs – his imagination is larger than life.

So to him on his birthday week, I say, “Imagine on little rainbow, for I can’t imagine my world without you.”


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