Boogers on the Wall

Dear Customer Service Agents,

Are you out there? Can you hear me? Do you even exist anymore?

Because I know when I tried to call you for my local Internet company you were nowhere to be found. In your place were some don’t-give-her-anything-we-promised and don’t-solve-her-problems monsters.

It was kind of pathetic.

I called because I received an email saying my bill was available online. However when I tried to make an online account to view said bill, I got an error message.

Apparently I didn’t have an access code. That would come when I got my paper bill. I also didn’t have an email on file with my account. So how I got sent an email saying my bill was available is beyond me.

When I chatted online with an agent she said I’d have to wait several days to get my access code, online account or anything really. That’s when I decided to take the plunge and call in.

It took a while to figure out who to talk to. Why these automated systems make you jump in an out of hoops is beyond me. How many menus and numbers do I have to think about dialing before I reach a live person?

After punching in nearly all of my sensitive ID numbers, and then half of my family members’, I was able to speak to a “customer service agent.” Who then asked me to verify all of my personal information, again.

Eventually the telephone agent got me logged in online. But that’s when I found out my bill was four times as much as I was promised. Four!

I’m not exaggerating.

But for some reason, there wasn’t anyone who could tell me why. There also weren’t any customer service agents who were willing to look up my initial sign-up phone conversation where I was promised a killer rate on high-speed Internet.

Why? Why couldn’t any of you help me?

I was transferred to the help desk where I was told that only a supervisor could check the original call and help adjust my bill. But, here’s the kicker, since I was calling on a Monday, chances were slim that I’d hear from the supervisor that day. It would probably be Tuesday. (As of Wednesday night I still hadn’t received a call back.)

That’s when I knew there were no true customer service agents at this company, only imposters. Because if one agent is willing to actually admit that their supervisor’s time is more valuable than mine and that they were too busy to take a few minutes to call me back, it’s pretty evident that there was no customer service going on. Ever.

I don’t care if Mondays are really busy at the Internet company call center. I know it might be hard to believe, but Mondays are crazy busy for this stay-at-home mom as well. And I wasted an hour of my time chatting online and calling in to several different agents who didn’t seem to think my time was valuable.

Why? Why have all the customer service agents disappeared? Why can’t you do what you promise? Why can’t you easily check my account and help me figure out what is going on?

Is it too much to ask for you to add a little customer service to your job? You are customer service agents after all.

I’d like to see you come back! I’d like to see you have passion for your job. And I’d like to see you actually help customers like me. Do what you promise! Because I am a customer and I deserve some service.

Sincerely,

Me

The stay-at-home mom who loves to waste her time discussing outrageous overages with you. Let’s do this again real soon.