It’s happened. I have slowly but surely transformed into a hoodie, sweats, pony-tail and cap wearing, never curling-my-hair or putting on makeup, stay-at-home mom.
And I can’t decide if that’s a bad thing.
Most days I don’t go anywhere. I might slip on my stylish moon boots to drop the boys off to school in the morning. But a lot of the time I’m home all day. I don’t have any interaction with the outside world. I don’t see anyone and they don’t see me.
Most days I’m throwing in laundry, cleaning my house or cooking something. Do I need to dress up fancy to stay home all day and keep up on my chores? No.
If anything it’s easier, it’s comfier and it’s warmer to wear loose-fitting, furry-lined sweats. Or better yet pajamas.
If I do go somewhere, it’s usually to the elementary school or grocery store. I have yet to see someone decked out at a PTA meeting or pushing a shopping cart in heels.
I admit it’s fun to get dolled up every once in a while. But the thought of it exhausts me. I’ve become lazy. Lazy and busy. I have three little munchkins to get ready each and every day. By the time I have a chance to get myself ready either I have no time left or I’m completely pooped.
Sometimes I see other moms looking their best – especially at church. I envy them. I barely have time to make sure my skirt isn’t tucked into my pantyhose – forget curling my hair and swiping on lipstick
Not to mention I am so busy making sure my boys have clothes that match and fit, I don’t ever think about myself. I rarely go out shopping for me. When you can fit the same clothes you wore your sophomore year of high school, why buy new ones?
Yet every once in a while I feel like I want to get ready. I want to dress up. I want to have new cute clothes to choose from out of my closet.
My husband has a fancy company party every December. It’s at a fancy hotel. With fancy food, fancy music and fancy attire. One problem: I don’t have anything fancy.
So every year I enter the dilemma of buying something to wear once or showing up to the party in sweats.
Last year I borrowed a cute skirt and top from a neighbor. This year the party has a Mad Men theme where Mid-Century Modern attire is appropriate. I raided my grandma’s fancy keepsake clothes and found a red dress I could wear. Then I borrowed a jacket, belt and necklace. I wasn’t about to buy something new for a one-night party.
Every year I get feeling down about myself because I don’t have anything nice to wear.
I’m starting to wonder if I’m the only mom who feels this way. Occasionally I do dress up and curl my hair. Then when I run into friends and family they almost look shocked to see me “ready.” What have I become?
I used to have style. I used to wear earrings. I used to have dozens of pairs of shoes.
Maybe I should invest in some new clothes. But then again, would I even wear them?
I wonder: How often do other moms buy themselves new clothes? How often do they wear what they buy?
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that I couldn’t buy myself something new, I just don’t. I rarely think about it. Maybe I should go through my closet and get rid of some stuff. Then make a goal of buying something new every month.
Is that being selfish? Uggh. I feel like this is just another way I have “lost” myself when I became a mom – I have completely lost my sense of style.
Maybe I’ll go pick me something out today. Then again, maybe I’ll just sit at home comfortable in my hoodie and jeans.
Boogers on the Wall 
Dec 05, 2013 @ 09:02:52
I’m not the greatest when it comes to fashion sense, but I never wanted to be the mom who was obviously still wearing styles that were 10 years old….you know, those shoes with huge chunky soles when ballet flats were “in”. But I rarely buy clothes for myself anymore, partly because I don’t know what to buy and partly because it seems that clothes are so darn expensive. I have a hard time paying more than $15 for a shirt, and everything I see in the stores that I like is $30+. And that means I’ve become the mom I never wanted to be when it comes to what I wear.
That said, I do try to “get ready” everyday, even if I am out of style. I was the sweats and hoodie mom after having my first baby and like you, I was just staying home, so why bother dressing up? However, after my twins were born, I realized that I play the part that I dress. If I feel sloppy (whatever that looks like on any given day…I don’t define it solely as sweats), then I behave that way too. My house looks sloppy, my kids look sloppy, my cooking is sloppy (and I’m realizing now that sloppy is one of those really weird words to say over and over). I find that I’m far more productive and feel so much better overall when I feel at least somewhat put together….which rarely includes adding accessories. If I’m wearing accessories, then I really have dressed up!
Dec 05, 2013 @ 16:41:10
I’m with you Jenn. When and why did clothes have to get so expensive. Even when there’s a sale, I still want the most expensive things. Sadly, I have expensive taste. Besides, I’d rather buy stuff for my kids these days anyway.
I think you are right about the fact that the way you dress impacts your attitude and personality. There’s a reason why there’s the saying, “Dress for Success.” I think the past few weeks I have been especially bad because it’s FREEZING outside and layered sweats help me survive. They do help me feel more lazy too 🙂